Zachy - Entry #14

I looked over my two companions, and my heart sunk a little. They were so young. I had hoped, I guess, that they would be older, wiser people, more in line with what one expects a "prophet" to be. But I was obviously the oldest of us, and though the girl - had she said her name was 'Eira'? - had a tough-as-nails look about her, I recalled that, moments before, within that growling, terrible inferno, she too had pinned herself against the wall, had experienced the same shock and fear that I had. I wondered if these people had dealt with circumstances quite as horrible as mine, though there are very few things worse than watching innocent people burning to death around you. More people I had failed to save. Or even help.

I shrugged, as though to let the thought roll off my shoulders and into the ash below. The boy - Chuck - had mentioned getting to know one another. Eira was looking at him with a look that was almost astonishment, and she was just opening her mouth when I interrupted, "No, I think he's right."

Her 'are you crazy' look shifted to me, and I suddenly felt like a schoolboy who didn't know the answer to the teacher's question. "I don't mind getting more information from you - " she began.

"I agree - " Chuck started in, but she plowed right on.

" - because I don't trust either of you, and for all I know, you're just more of them." She allowed herself a quick glance at the open door of the train. "But not here."

She was right. I glanced at Chuck, who pursed his lips and nodded. "Okay then," I said. "Well ... I'll go first." I waited for one of the others to say 'No, don't risk it, let me instead!', but it didn't happen, and I stepped slowly toward the train.

"Careful, man," Chuck said, "I really don't like it."

"Understatement of the fucking century," replied Eira.

Eira and Chuck watched nervously from the platform as I stepped over the gap, and I had a moment of normality in which I realized that, as the oldest, it might just have become my responsibility to lead this wayward crew. Then, the thought was rudely interrupted.

There was an inherent wrongness to the place. It looked for all the world like an ordinary car, with dingy seats and poles greasy with the handprints of a million commuters, but wherever I turned, shadows seemed to leap out from the corners of my eyes. There was a constant whispering that almost wasn't there, but was just there enough for me to be creeped out. I pivoted very slowly about for nearly a full minute, then relaxed. Nothing had jumped out and killed me, strange as it was. It was all clear.

"Well?" came Eira's voice from behind.

"It's all right," I said. "Come in."

Eira stepped in, with Chuck close behind. I watched as they were both gripped by a sudden wave of anxiety, from which Eira recovered first - she set herself down in the nearest seat, but did not take her eyes off Chuck and I. Chuck let out a breath, "Just as I thought," he said. "Really fucking eerie."

I jumped as the door hissed closed, and the train gave a shudder. "This is the conductor speaking," said a tinny woman's voice over the intercom, "Evidently, we had a minor issue coming in, but everything's been cleared up, now. The boss has ordered me to transport you to a place of safety. We'll be taking a ... well, I suppose you'd call it a shortcut. In the meantime, I suggest, as Chuck mentioned, getting to know one another. Thank you."

The intercom clicked off, and the three of us looked at one another with what I imagined were identical perplexed expressions. I wondered who the boss was ... certainly not Kalki, as my most recent visitor had told me that he hadn't really come back yet, and Kalki hadn't seemed like the sort to want to reveal himself to these people just yet. I didn't know who these two had been visited by, so I assumed it must have been one of them. Neither, however, seemed to show any sign of recognition, though I supposed they could easily be covering up, keeping something secret ... no, thinking like that was bad. I had to trust these people.

"Where were we?" asked Eira, as we began to move.

"You were in the middle of not trusting us," said Chuck.

Eira shrugged. "Give me a reason to. What do I have to go on?"

"I don't even care anymore," I said suddenly. "All the stuff that's happened these last couple of days? It doesn't matter if I can't trust you. I don't even care if one of you pulls a gun and shoots me dead right where I stand. I'll view it as a favor ... "

"The last few days have been complete hell," said Chuck, setting himself down across from Eira, "but you aren't going to survive the end of the world with a pessimistic attitude like that."

And just like that, the tension broke. He'd said the magic words, mentioned the impending end to everything we'd ever loved, had ever cared for, had mentioned the one thing we all knew and hadn't wanted to admit: that everything was different now. I was already standing, and we had to start somewhere, so just like that, I began to recite everything that had happened thus far. I told them about Kalki's first visit to me, the day I'd killed the man in surgery (they all nodded upon hearing about his strange and sudden appearance, presumably having had similar experiences). I told them about my conviction that it was a hallucination, and how Django had been murdered, and the note that I'd received. I told them about the next day, heading to Nellie's, changing the story so that Kalki on his own was the one who had physically assaulted and, when I was unconscious, killed her, though I knew that I had been under his control. I suppose I didn't want to make them think that I'd end up doing the same to them; it wouldn't exactly help the trust issues.

"Damn," muttered Eira, shaking her head.

Chuck grimaced. "That's messed-up in so many ways."

I nodded. "Tell me about it. Suffice it to say that I understand if you don't trust me yet, but - "

But something else had caught my eye. Eira was staring at something outside the window, and as Chuck and I followed her gaze, I saw what held her attention. Outside the train window, strange colors and shapes were flying by, like a kaleidoscope of whirling, shifting energies. The ride had been so smooth that I'd forgotten during my story that we'd been moving at all.

"That's probably the shortcut the woman was talking about," Chuck said.

"You were right. Fucking eerie," said Eira.

He gave a wry smile.

I cleared my throat to regain their attentions. "So, yeah, anyway ... I can get not trusting me, I mean really, I can. But some reason or another we're all here, so in the meantime - "

"We have to stick together," Chuck finished.

"Yeah," I replied, slightly envious of the fact that he'd been able to say it without sounding cheesy or stupid, as I undoubtedly would have.

I could tell that they were both still nervous about revealing much about themselves, but we were beginning to warm up to one another. Granted, I realized that it would take quite a while before we were all best friends or whatnot, but that we'd all been dragged together by the same sort of circumstances, and had been led to this particular point, seemed to suggest our fates were intermingled in some crazy way.

Whatever my presumably bloodstained future was going to bring, these two were going to be there for the long haul. The thought gave me a bit of comfort.

"Okay," I said. "Who wants to go next?"